Gemma Hartley is a freelance journalist and author of the forthcoming book “Fed Up: Emotional Labor, Women, and The Way Forward,” set to release Fall 2018.
She received her B.A. in English Writing from the University of Nevada, Reno and gave birth to her first child a week after graduation. She came into her career as a writer after four years as an at-home parent, and quickly fell in love with the high-paced hustle of freelance life. Her work has appeared in Glamour, Women’s Health, The Washington Post, The Huffington Post, CNBC, Good Housekeeping, and more.
She lives in Reno, NV with her husband, three children, a wonderful dog, and a terrible cat.
Sneak Peek Into What You’ll Learn…
01:19 – Gemma shares how she developed her freelance writing career while raising three kids and the unusual steps she took to find the time to write.
06:28 – Gemma points to what she learned from Laura Vanderkam and how she implemented it.
12:00 – We hear the specific advice Gemma would give to a person with a busy schedule who would like to work on an independent pursuit.
15:43 – Gemma tells us why work-life balance for her is like a pendulum swinging back and forth.
19:26 – Gemma shares what self-care looks like for her and where she finds fulfillment.
21:31 – Gemma explains what “emotional labor” means and why she wrote an article about it in Harper’s Bazaar.
25:50 – Gemma tells us more about how she created the Harper’s Bazaar article and how she got it published.
31:06 – Gemma explains the gendered aspects of emotional labor and how early conditioning in childhood affects it.
35:48 – We learn what advice Gemma would give to parents to ensure that their children understand the value of emotional labor and why it’s important.
37:25 – Not all partners who do the majority of the emotional labor feel burdened by it. Gemma explains why.
40:23 – Gemma discusses how to make emotional labor visible without feeling like each partner is keeping score.
48:15 – Gemma talks about how to divide the “management” aspects of emotional labor between partners.
57:36 – Gemma discusses how to handle the situation when one partner refuses to engage in a conversation about emotional labor.
1:01:02 – Brass Tacks— The lightning round of concrete advice and tips.
Quotable quotes:
- “At the same time, I found my understanding of the world was much richer because of motherhood…”
- “The work side is supposed to be less important to because I’m a mother, but it’s not. I really value the work that I do.”
- “I try to make sure that my day has a little bit of everything that fills me up. I’m trying to make sure that everything that I love and prioritize is there.”
- “It’s not like I just go out there and every idea is gold. I get so many rejections and that is just a part of this job…for every big piece I write, there are probably 20 rejections for it…I put myself out there a lot and I think that is what you have to do for your work as a journalist to pay off…you have to be ready for 5, 10, 20 no’s for every yes…”
- “None of us wants to feel like the work we are doing is invisible because when it feels invisible, it’s as if it doesn’t have value.”
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